Compare and contrast the ships in “The Cargo Hulks” and the Asian Tiger in “Breaking Ships.”
Paper details:
In an expository essay, compare and contrast the ships in “The Cargo Hulks” and the Asian Tiger in “Breaking Ships.” You must refer to both passages in your essay, including using appropriate quotes from both stories.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Key Page 1
English 12
2011/12 Released Exam
August 2012 — Form A
Provincial Examination — Answer Key
Cognitive Processes
W = Retrieve Information
X = Recognize Meaning
Y = Interpret Texts
Z = Analyze Texts
C = Writing
Weightings
4%
7%
28%
32%
29%
Topics
1. Stand-Alone Text
2. Synthesis Texts 1 and 2
3. Analysis of Synthesis Texts 1 and 2
4. Composition
Question Types
23 = Multiple Choice (MC)
3 = Written Response (WR)
Question
Number
Keyed
Response
Cognitive
Process Mark Topic PLO
Question
Type
1. C Y 1 1 – MC
2. D W 1 1 – MC
3. A Z 1 1 – MC
4. C Y 1 1 – MC
5. C X 1 1 – MC
6. D Y 1 1 – MC
7. C Y 1 1 – MC
8. D Y 1 2 – MC
9. B X 1 2 – MC
10. A W 1 2 – MC
11. D X 1 2 – MC
12. D X 1 2 – MC
13. C Y 1 2 – MC
14. D Y 1 2 – MC
15. C Y 1 2 – MC
16. D X 1 2 – MC
17. B W 1 2 – MC
18. B Z 1 2 – MC
19. A X 1 2 – MC
20. B Y 1 2 – MC
21. C Y 1 2 – MC
22. A Z 1 3 – MC
23. D Z 1 3 – MC
Question
Number
Keyed
Response
Cognitive
Process Mark Topic PLO
Question
Type
1. – Y 12 1 – WR
2. – Z 24 3 – WR
3. – C 24 4 – WR
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 1
English 12
2011/12 Released Exam
August 2012 — Form A
Provincial Examination — Scoring Guide
PART A: STAND-ALONE TEXT
This story takes place in the 1950s in a small community.
Head Cook at Weddings and Funerals
by Vi Plotnikoff
1 “The most wonderful day in a mother’s life is when her daughter marries into a good family,” I often
heard Aunt Florence say. “Because she knows her girl will be taken care of for the rest of her life.”
2 My mother would agree with her sister, then look around at her three daughters with a somewhat
worried expression.
3 Aunt Florence, predictably, had married well. Her husband’s relatives were all pillars of the
Doukhobor1 community.
4 Aunt Florence and Uncle Fred had a son, Fred Junior, who’d married well to an agreeable and
pretty girl named Tina, from an upstanding Doukhobor family. They proceeded to move into the
apartment right across the courtyard from Fred’s parents and produce little Fred, much to the delight
of Aunt Florence.
5 Aunt Florence’s other child was a girl, my cousin Marusa, four years older than I. Her mother had
great expectations of Marusa, who was extraordinarily pretty with her dark curls, sparkling brown eyes
and tiny figure—a figure much enhanced by the fitted gabardine skirts she wore, the delicate nylon
blouses with little artificial bouquets of flowers at the throat, or the soft, fuzzy, pastel sweaters. I felt
awkward and plain next to her. I was a giraffe with straight blonde hair and blue eyes.
6 When I visited her house, Marusa could sometimes be pleasant, even fun. Not stuck-up like she was
at school. She let me try on her earrings and makeup, but only if she was in the mood.
7 “She can have her pick of all the nicest Doukhobor boys,” Aunt Florence would say. “You should see
Saturday morning at our place. The fancy cars and pickup trucks come in a stream, asking Marusa to go
to the movies that night. She’ll marry well.”
* * *
8 Marusa was almost seventeen by now and dating for nearly a year.
1 Doukhobors: a group of people, primarily farmers, who migrated from Russia to Canada
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 2
9 Peter was a tall, gawky young man with a too-short haircut and a pleasing personality. He wasn’t
very good-looking except when he smiled and showed his dimples. He was showing a lot of
dimples tonight.
10 Peter was considered an exceedingly good catch, especially by the mothers of marriageable daughters.
His parents had a small tidy farm, vast apple orchards, a large ranch house with many bedrooms to
accommodate their four sons. Mable Zarubin, Peter’s mother, was a hard-working opinionated woman
who kept a clean home and was a renowned cook. In fact her borsch became so famous, she’d
graduated to head cook at weddings and funerals.
11 Most of the women in the Doukhobor community helped out with cooking at these important events.
The huge wedding feast required several settings, depending on the number of friends and relatives
invited, as did the after-funeral meal serving the singers, gravediggers and family of the deceased.
12 Always at these occasions, in the place of honour at the dining table, there was the borsch. The special
soup, thick with vegetables, laced with rich cream. The dish every young girl learned to cook at her
mother’s side.
13 Peter’s mother had impressed the older women with her knowledge as to the right amount of butter
and whipping cream, the correct pinch of dill, the quick and pretty way she shredded the cabbage,
diced potatoes. So it was at an early age that she became head cook, instructing the other cooks,
tasting, giving the final nod to the borsch before it was carried out to the tables by the serving women.
14 Marusa and Peter began going steady that spring and the following Christmas she received an
engagement ring with a tiny diamond.
15 On a hot evening, a few days after Marusa’s eighteenth birthday, just as we were finishing supper
dishes in the stifling kitchen, Peter’s new pink and white Pontiac with the chrome fins drove into our
yard. Peter had quit school and got on at the sawmill, making payments to the credit union on the car.
16 Through the screen door, we watched Marusa lift a big box from the back seat, give it to Peter and hand
in hand they walked up the steps.
17 “Come in, come in both of you,” mama bustled about, taking off her stained apron and shoving shoes
into a corner. “Have you had your supper? It won’t take me a minute to set the table, heat the soup.
I made it with fresh peas from the garden.”
18 I stared at mama. Now that Marusa was almost a wife, she’d suddenly acquired a dignified new
status. Above waitress or store clerk or even secretary. Only a teacher or nurse was superior to
a well-married woman.
19 “Thank you, tyota2, but we’ve already eaten at Peter’s place. His mother taught me to make galooptsi3.”
20 “Yours were even better than my mother’s,” Peter said.
21 Peter must be blind in love, I thought. Unless she’d improved vastly, Marusa was a careless cook. I’d
seen her vareniki come apart in boiling water, fillings bubbling on top, pastry wrappers floating merrily.
2 tyota: aunt
3 galooptsi: cabbage rolls
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 3
22 “I want to show you something,” Marusa said.
23 She untied string from the box, pushed aside tissue, lifted out lace and satin.
24 “Page 352, Eaton’s4 catalogue,” I breathed.
25 “Marusa, what have you done?” Mother’s shocked voice.
26 “Isn’t it beautiful? And look at the veil.”
27 “But I saw your mother sewing your wedding clothes,” mama said.
28 “She doesn’t know. I borrowed the money from Peter.”
29 “You should tell your mother right away. I don’t think she’ll let you wear it.”
30 “It’s my wedding and I should wear whatever I want. But I want you to tell her. She won’t listen
to me.” Marusa had her stubborn look.
31 “Oh Marusa, you should wear it. It’s just beautiful.”
32 “Quiet, Ana, this is none of your business. Marusa,” she turned to her niece, “you must tell your
mother yourself.”
33 “She’s too worried about what Peter’s mother will say.” She looked at Peter, who was fidgeting with
his car keys. “Well? Don’t you think I should wear what I want for my own wedding?”
34 “Your mother and mine won’t like it,” he said in a mild, hesitant voice.
35 “Whose wedding is it anyway? I thought it was ours.”
36 She scooped up the gown, stuffed it into the box and marched outdoors, ponytail bobbing. Peter
followed, looking worried.
* * *
37 It was a clear and dewy summer morning. A beautiful day to be married. We were up early, rushed
through chores and breakfast, dressed in new clothes purchased at the co-op. Hurried to the bride’s
home to help with the cooking and the table setting.
38 Loud voices broke out directly overhead in Marusa’s bedroom. Aunt Florence’s sounded mad. I
dropped the pans in the sink, went through the living room, past guests who lolled on couches and
chairs which were pushed back against the walls to make room for the dining tables.
39 Upstairs I skimmed along the corridor, past bedrooms with their tall narrow windows, spare
whitewashed walls, where Marusa’s grandparents and parents slept. And I thought it no wonder
Marusa often complained everyone knew when she came in on a Saturday night, for each squeaky
tiptoe, each cautious footstep could be heard on the creaking floorboards as she crept past all those
disapproving doors.
4 Eaton’s: a department store
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 4
40 The small commotion brewing around Marusa’s door consisted of the bride, her aunt and her mother.
Aunt Florence had her turkey look on. Face all red, neck long, saying in a loud voice that she was so
ashamed, and to change right away and maybe just maybe not too much harm was done even though it
would be all over town by Monday. Marusa was weeping, ruining her rouge, and my mother was
standing ineffectually between them, clasping and unclasping her hands.
41 Then Marusa, who’d looked right through me at school and kept on talking to her friends, who’d
ignored me during family visits unless she was bored and then taken me upstairs, told me ghosts were
seen floating along the dim hallways, even told me I’d been a foundling abandoned by my real mother
near the cemetery, suddenly became Marusa my friend. She reached out and took my hand.
42 In that instant, as we faced our mothers, I became her ally. Us against them. Cousins forever. I felt her
cool fingers, the pressure of the unfamiliar wedding band.
43 “Yes. Wear what you want, Marusa. It’s your marriage.”
44 Was that me sounding profound and grown up? Aunt Florence and my mother looked at me for the
first time, not knowing what to make of this unexpected alliance.
45 “It’s your wedding, after all.”
46 “Ana,” my mother had recovered. “It’s none of your business, or mine either. I’m not going to take
sides, Florence,” she said, then turned to Marusa. “Although it will be easier on everyone if you give in
to your mother, dear.” Diplomatic. No one could ever get mad at my mother.
47 Marusa let go of my fingers, smiled at me as I said one last “do it,” shrugged her shoulders.
48 I went downstairs, thinking I’d do the same some day. When my turn came, I wouldn’t give in either.
For I’d felt Marusa’s strength. Through her I could reach my dreams, unformed as they were. Maybe
I’d take the university program at school, go on to college. I wouldn’t even marry before I was twenty.
I could do as I wanted and Marusa had shown me how. She’d opened the door a crack and I had
slipped through after her. And the best, most wonderful part of all was that she had turned to me.
49 “I am ready,” a voice said, and there she was, in her traditional outfit, as demure5 as she’d looked at the
zapoy6. She searched the group of people around the steps, seeking approval, smiling when she found
it. She didn’t look at me.
50 I followed the crowd to the cars, my unformed dreams dying inside me.
51 It was fleeting, Marusa’s independence. Just those few hours in the wedding gown when she lived her
dream. And mine. For after the wedding, after the ceremonies and the feasting, she became a dutiful
wife. Within a year she bore a son. Within five years, she had three little boys tugging at her while she
shopped at the co-op.
52 Under Mable’s tutelage, Marusa was becoming an expert cook, her pirahi pastry light, her borsch
renowned. It was rumoured, according to Aunt Florence, that Marusa would eventually take over her
mother-in-law’s position as head cook at weddings and funerals.
5 demure: composed, modest
6 zapoy: engagement ceremony
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 5
PART A: STAND-ALONE TEXT
INSTRUCTIONS: In paragraph form and in at least 150 words, answer question 1 in the Response
Booklet. Write in ink. Use the Organization and Planning space to plan your
work. The mark for your answer will be based on the appropriateness of the examples
you use as well as the adequacy of your explanation and the quality of your written
expression.
1. Discuss the character of Marusa in “Head Cook at Weddings and Funerals.” Use paragraph form
and support your response with specific references to the text.
Suggestions Regarding Response:
CHARACTERISTICS REFERENCE
• She is very attractive paragraph 5
• She is “two-faced”: she ignores her cousin in some
situations, but treats her with respect and as a
friend/confidante in others
paragraphs 6 and 41
• She briefly seeks independence paragraphs 16–36
• She seeks to avoid direct confrontation paragraphs 30 and 49
• She is manipulative:
– she controls Peter
– she attempts to get her way by crying
– she uses her cousin as an ally
paragraphs 35 and 36, 40–42
• She becomes traditional: a wife, mother and
expert cook
– could be seen as either a positive or a
negative
paragraphs 51 and 52
• She is shallow and vain, primarily concerned with
her own image
various references
This list is not exhaustive.
The exemplars will provide sample responses.
Marks will be awarded for content and written expression.
Refer to the Holistic Scale on page 6 of this key.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 6
SCORING GUIDE FOR STAND-ALONE TEXT
This is a fir st-draft r e sponse and should be assessed as such. The use of paragraph structure is
assessed holistically with reference to the clarity of expression and organization.
6
The six response is superior and may draw upon any number of factors, such as depth of discussion,
effectiveness of argument, or level of insight. It exhibits an effective writing style and a sophisticated use
of language. Despite its clarity and precision, the response need not be error-free.
5
The five response is proficient and reflects a strong grasp of the topic and the text. The references to the
passage may be explicit or implicit and convincingly support a thesis. The writing is well organized and
demonstrates a strong command of the conventions of language. Errors may be present, but are not
distracting.
4
The four response is competent. The assertions tend to be simplistic; there are no significant errors in
understanding. References are present and appropriate, but may be limited to only part of the text. The writing
is organized and straightforward. Conventions of language are usually followed, but some errors are evident.
3
The three response is barely adequate. Understanding of the topic and/or the text may be partially flawed.
Support may consist of long references to the text which are not clearly connected to a central idea or may be
meagre or repetitive. The response may show some sense of purpose, but errors may be distracting.
2
The two response is inadequate. While there is an attempt to address the topic, understanding of the text or
the task may be seriously flawed. Errors are recurring, distracting, and often impede meaning.
1
The one response is unacceptable. Although the response attempts to address the question, it is too brief or
there is a complete lack of control in the writing.
0
The zero response reflects a complete misunderstanding of the text and/or the task, is off-topic, or is a
restatement of the question.
*Any zero paper must be cleared by the section leader.
NR
A blank paper with no response given.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 7
PART B: SYNTHESIS TEXT 1
The Cargo Hulks1
by Peter Trower
5
10
15
20
Ramshackle barges
limp the coastal passages
carrying hogfuel and sulphur
to the ever-hungry mills—
food for the insatiable2
bellies of the digesters,
ammunition for the smokestacks
to vomit at the gulls.
Cargo hulks
stripped of masts and superstructure—
name rank identity
any vestige3 of esteem,
they flounder through the waves
like great gutted whales
behind the strutting tugboats
and they dream
of full sail—
ferocious high seas thundering,
merciless Antarctic gales,
the howling challenge of the Horn4,
shrouds under full stress bulging
1 cargo hulk: old ship used for carrying freight
2 insatiable: unable to be satisfied
3 vestige: trace
4 Horn: southern tip of South America
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 8
25
30
35
40
45
like a trumpet player’s cheeks,
the pitching—the nearly foundering,
the forging on
to dolphin country
in the long rolling heat
past stark coasts where volcanoes growl
like old men in beds—
equatorial becalments5,
deckboards cracking in the sun,
parched voices croaking for a wind
on the hard green road.
Blowing north again
before a good kicking gust
through starsure climbing nights
new-minted days
to drop anchor at last,
winner of the harrowing6 marathon
before new-raised cabins smoking welcome
in the pioneer bays.
Memories melting
in the cold reality of rain
they wake to ultimate winters by wharves
in the overwhelming stink
become mere pawns
in the same industrial equation
that fouls the water brown and foaming
along their flanks.
5 equatorial becalments: calm waters around the Equator
6 harrowing: frightening
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 9
PART B: SYNTHESIS TEXT 2
Breaking Ships
How Supertankers and Cargo Ships are Dismantled
on the Beaches of Bangladesh
Dhaka, May 2005
by Roland Buerk
This passage is the introduction to a book about the breaking and recycling of the oil tanker, the
Asian Tiger. The book explores issues that are controversial and illustrates how desperation can
lead people to make difficult decisions.
1 There are few sights more humbling than a
man bearing a terrible load on his shoulders,
working in mud and filth for a pittance1, who
can still raise a smile. That was the scene that
greeted me every day on the beach at
Chittagong, in Bangladesh. There, tens of
thousands of men labor night and day to turn
the world’s discarded ships into scrap. The
work is hard. Some venture deep into the
darkened, oil-stained holds of tankers with
blowtorches to cut up the vessels. Their jobs in
the tropical heat are not only physically tough
but dangerous as well. Men have lost their
lives in sudden devastating explosions. Others
haul the metal up the beach, lifting great
weights with skinny arms, or stagger on thin
legs out onto the mudflats, carrying steel ropes
and heavy pipes. In the rainy season it is
worse. Then the ground underfoot turns into a
quagmire2. It is a remarkable display of the
strength of the human spirit that men can not
just endure such conditions but also find some
joy amid their hardship.
2 This book follows the entire process of
breaking up the Asian Tiger, an enormous oil
tanker that weighed thirty-eight thousand tons.
She was rammed onto the beach one fine day in
spring 2004. That morning we met the ship’s
new owner, Mohammed Mohsin, at a pontoon
on the Kamaphuli River. It was just upstream
from where the mouth of the river meets the
Bay of Bengal, and the perfect place to board
our boat out of sight of the pier masters keen to
collect a toll. We puttered across the water in a
small hand-built wooden boat toward the motor
launch that would take us out to the tanker. The
harsh sunlight bounced off the water and,
despite the early hour, everyone sweated gently
in the humid heat.
3 Getting on board the Asian Tiger was no easy
task. She towered over our small launch as we
drew up to her side. There was a precarious
scramble up a wooden rope ladder before we
reached her long, steep gangplank. Once we
were on the deck it seemed impossible to us
that men could even conceive of trying to
break her up—she looked as invulnerable as a
city block, and as massive. The ship appeared
to be in good condition, too. There was little
rust and her paintwork was still bright.
Everything seemed to be in fully working
order. It was only economics that had
condemned her to end her days in Chittagong,
1 pittance: a very small or inadequate amount of money
2 quagmire: a soft, boggy area of land
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 10
no longer a viable working vessel because
insuring her and her cargoes had become too
expensive.
4 On the last miles of her lifetime’s journey, the
Asian Tiger surged through the waters of the
Bay of Bengal, moving as powerfully as she
had on her ocean crossings carrying crude
from the Middle East to the tiger economies3
of Southeast Asia. This was not a ship
staggering and gasping to the scrapper’s yard,
at risk of sinking at any moment. Her propeller
was still thudding the sea, churning the water
into a long wake, when she hit the shore.
5 It was only at that moment that she suddenly
stopped being a vessel and became a lump of
scrap. She was so vast that at sea the
movement of her hull with the waves had been
almost imperceptible, but once the movement
stopped as her hull hit bottom and she was no
longer floating, the difference was immediately
obvious. Everyone felt it, as the life went out
of her. Tears pricked the eyes of the tough
seamen who had worked on board the vessel.
At that moment the Asian Tiger died. She was
not a ship anymore, but a giant piece of steel
now abandoned on the beach—the detritus4 of
the industrialized world left to be disposed of
by the poor.
6 The shipping industry relies on the
willingness of nations like Bangladesh to
handle its garbage—dangerous, dirty, and
polluting as it is. The ship-breaking beaches
of Chittagong, in Bangladesh, Alang, in India,
and other places in benighted5 parts of the
world may seem a long way from the soaring
cities of the West, but they are a part of the
process, too. Almost every product
imaginable is transported by sea; the work on
the beach is a vital part of the finances of the
shipping industry, a fiercely competitive
world. It has been estimated that breaking a
ship on the coast of America would cost at
3 tiger economies: rapidly growing economies
4 detritus: waste or debris
5 benighted: in this context, underprivileged
least $14 million. Now the vessels are sent to
the Third World at the end of their useful
lives, and shipping lines are able to sell them
for cash. Old, outdated vessels that in
previous years were viewed only as a liability
are now an asset. It helps to keep down the
shipping industry’s costs as well as,
ultimately, the price of goods. Everything
would cost us more if poor men were not
willing to do this work for so little reward.
7 As the great ship’s journey ended at
Chittagong, mine began.
8 Again and again I drove along the coast road,
turning off down the narrow lane paved with
blackened cinders to the beach and the shipbreaking
yard to see how progress was
coming along. At first, not much seemed to
happen. Although tiny streamers of orange
sparks drifted along the hull as men worked
with their blowtorches inside, they seemed to
be making little impression on the ship. But
then as the days turned into weeks, large
chunks began to be cut away. The sweeping
lines of the Asian Tiger were torn apart into
jagged edges. Once the operation was fully
under way, the process of destruction was
remarkably efficient and quick. It takes far less
time to destroy than to build, and she was
reduced to the raw materials from which she
was made in a matter of months.
9 Every day I ate in the cheap restaurants where
the workers took their meager meals—
breakfast and lunch—at a few cents a time.
They welcomed me into their homes, huts
made of mud and straw where they rested after
exhausting shifts at work, and into their lives.
They told me about their hopes and dreams
and their disappointments. Like everyone, all
they were looking for and striving after was a
better life for themselves and their children.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 11
10 I traveled to the north of Bangladesh, a
beautiful place that seemed to an outsider like
some kind of rural idyll, where people still live
by tilling the land according to ancient
methods, and carts drawn by oxen make their
way home from the fields at sunset along the
pathways shaded by banana trees. And I heard
men there tell of the lives of excruciating
poverty they led. It was all very well, the vivid
greens of the countryside and the clean air, but
there were few work opportunities and little to
eat. Grinding hopelessness made them think
that anything was better, even a risky job on
the beach, carrying steel for a dollar a day.
11 I also saw another side of the industry—those
who had become rich buying ships and selling
the scrap steel. I visited them in their
comfortable mansions in the best parts of the
city and ate with them in the finest restaurants.
They were equally welcoming, the wealthy and
the poor. It is easy to condemn from the
comfort of an armchair in a prosperous
Western nation those who run such industries
that pollute and exploit. But those I met, at
least, were decent men with true convictions.
They were open, and willing to let me see a
business they are convinced operates not only
for their personal profit but also because their
country, in order to develop, needs the steel
they provide.
12 They genuinely believed they were doing their
best for Bangladesh in circumstances that were
far from ideal. They kept telling me it was a
dirty job but someone had to do it.
13 So this is the story of all their lives over six
months in 2004, the year they killed the Asian
Tiger.
Figure 1
© Claudio Cambon Photography
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 12
PART C: ANALYSIS OF SYNTHESIS TEXTS 1 AND 2
INSTRUCTIONS: In a multi-paragraph (3 or more paragraphs) expository essay of at least
300 words, answer question 2 in the Response Booklet. Write in ink. Use the
Organization and Planning space to plan your work. The mark for your answer
will be based on the appropriateness of the examples you use as well as the adequacy
of your explanation and the quality of your written expression.
2. Compare and contrast the ships in “The Cargo Hulks” and the Asian Tiger in “Breaking Ships.”
You must refer to both passages in your essay.
Suggestions Regarding Response:
COMPARISONS CONTRASTS
• The cargo hulks were once (or dreamed of
being) powerful ships, moving under “full
sail” (line 17) with “ferocious high seas
thundering” (line 18) and through “merciless
Antarctic gales” (line 19) meeting head on the
“howling challenge of the Horn” (line 20).
The Asian Tiger was also a powerful ship
before it was run up on the beach, with “little
rust and her paintwork still bright”
(paragraph 3). As she was making her last
run toward the beach she “surged through
the waters … moving as powerfully as she
[ever] had” (paragraph 4). “Her propeller
was still thudding the sea, churning the water
into a long wake, when she hit the shore”
(paragraph 4)
• The cargo hulks, while significantly
altered in appearance, are left to decay in
their moorings, whereas the Asian Tiger
is broken into scrap while she is still
functional and capable
• The cargo hulks are personified
throughout, whereas the Asian Tiger
“dies” (paragraph 5)
• The cargo hulks are ignored and of little
value, whereas the Asian Tiger continues
to have economic value
• Both the cargo hulks (throughout) and the
Asian Tiger are personified (paragraphs 4
and 5)
• The cargo hulks have “become mere pawns /
in the same industrial equation / that fouls
the water brown and foaming / along their
flanks” (lines 45–48). The Asian Tiger has
become the “detritus of the industrialized
world left to be disposed of by the poor”
(paragraph 5)
This list is not exhaustive.
The exemplars will provide sample responses.
Marks will be awarded for content and written expression.
Refer to the Holistic Scale on page 13 of this key.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 13
SCORING GUIDE FOR ANALYSIS OF SYNTHESIS TEXTS 1 AND 2
This is a first-draft response and should be assessed as such.
The response is assessed holistically.
6
The six essay is superior, demonstrating an insightful understanding of the texts. The essay shows a
sophisticated approach to synthesis, including pertinent references. The writing style is effective and
demonstrates skillful control of language. Despite its clarity and precision, the essay need not be error-free.
5
The five essay is proficient, demonstrating a clear understanding of the texts at an interpretive level.
The essay clearly synthesizes the concepts within the texts. References may be explicit or implicit and
convincingly support the analysis. The writing is well organized and reflects a strong command of the
conventions of language. Errors may be present, but are not distracting.
4
The four essay is competent. Understanding of the texts tends to be literal and superficial. Some synthesis
is apparent. The essay may rely heavily on paraphrasing. References are present and appropriate, but may be
limited. The writing is organized and straightforward. Conventions of language are usually followed, but
some errors are evident.
3
The three essay is barely adequate. Understanding of the texts may be partially flawed. An attempt at
synthesis is evident. References to the texts are not clearly connected to a central idea or may be repetitive.
The response may be somewhat underdeveloped. A sense of purpose may be evident, but errors can be
distracting.
2
The two essay is inadequate. While there is an attempt to address the topic, understanding of the texts or
the task may be seriously flawed. An essay that makes reference to both texts but refers only fleetingly to
one of them is inadequate. The response may be seriously underdeveloped. Errors are recurring, distracting,
and impede meaning.
1
The one essay is unacceptable. Although the essay mentions both texts, the essay is too brief to address the
topic or there may be a complete lack of control in the writing.
0
The zero essay reflects a complete misunderstanding of the texts and/or the task, or is a restatement of the
question. Exclusive reference to only one text does not constitute synthesis. Exclusively narrative responses
reflect a complete misunderstanding of the task.
*Any zero paper must be cleared by the section leader.
NR
A blank paper with no response given.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 14
PART D: COMPOSITION
INSTRUCTIONS: Using standard English, write in the Response Booklet, a coherent, unified,
multi-paragraph (3 or more paragraphs) composition of at least 300 words
on the topic below. In your composition, you may apply any appropriate method
of development including exposition, persuasion, description, and narration.
Use the Organization and Planning space to plan your work.
3. Write a multi-paragraph composition on the topic below. In addressing the topic, consider all
possibilities. You may draw support from the experiences of others or from any aspect of your life:
your reading and your experiences. You do not have to accept the basic premise of the topic.
Topic:
A person’s view of the world may change over time
Marks will be awarded for content and written expression.
Refer to the Holistic Scale on page 15 of this key.
English 12 – 1208 Form A Scoring Guide Page 15
SCORING GUIDE FOR COMPOSITION
A composition may apply any effective and appropriate method of development which includes any combination
of exposition, persuasion, description, and narration. No one form of writing should be considered superior to
another. This is a first-draft r e sponse and should be assessed as such.
The use of paragraph structure is assessed holistically with reference to the clarity of expression and
organization.
6
The six paper is superior and may draw upon any number of factors, such as maturity of style, depth of
discussion, effectiveness of argument, use of literary and/or rhetorical devices, sophistication of wit, or
quality of imagination. This composition exhibits an effective writing style and a sophisticated use of
language. Despite its clarity and precision, this paper need not be error-free.
5
The five paper is proficient. The composition displays some manipulation of language to achieve a desired
effect and exhibits a clear sense of voice and of audience. The writing is thoughtful and interesting.
Vocabulary and sentence structure are varied and serve the writer’s purpose successfully. Errors may be
present, but are not distracting.
4
The four paper is competent. The composition conveys the writer’s ideas, but without flair or strong
control. Diction and syntax are usually appropriate, but lack variety. Structure, regardless of type, is
predictable and relatively mechanical. The paper shows a clear sense of the writer’s purpose. Conventions
of language are usually followed, but some errors are evident.
3
The three paper is barely adequate. The paper may feature somewhat underdeveloped or simplistic ideas.
Transition[s] may be weak or absent. Support is frequently in the form of listed details. Little variety in
diction and sentence structure is discernible. The composition may reflect some sense of purpose, but errors
may be distracting.
2
The two paper is inadequate. The ideas are seriously underdeveloped and awkwardly expressed. The
composition may be excessively colloquial or reflect inadequate knowledge of the conventions of language.
While meaning is apparent, errors are frequent and rudimentary.
1
The one paper is unacceptable and may be compromised by its deficiency of composition, content, diction,
syntax, structure, voice, or conventions of language.
0
The zero paper manifests an achievement less than outlined in a scale-point one, is written in verse,
is off-topic, or is a restatement of the topic.
*Any zero paper must be cleared by the section leader.
NR
A blank paper with no response given.
http://www.bced.gov.bc.ca/exams/search/grade12/english/release/key/1112en_pk.pdf